01 June 2009

PhD Mail

So Friday's meeting with Super was not a complete disaster after all. Far from it, in fact and I would almost go so far as to say, it was a pretty good meeting.

Although I had decided about a week ago now, that I wasn't going to quit -- I didn't want to quit anymore -- I still considered quitting as an option because maybe it was too late for the PhD to be salvaged. I did mentally prepare myself for, depending on how the meeting went, to tell Super in Friday's meeting, that I was going to quit. But after the meeting going quite well, I finally put all ideas of quitting behind me. And I'm really quite happy about it. :D

I imagine Super wasn't amazingly happy that I came into his office with this worried 'I-still-have-no-idea-what-the-hell-I'm-doing!' look on my face, yet again. He asked me if I was confident (maybe about the small part we were discussing) and I just said 'No, not at all. Not about anything really.' I did try to put across to him how worried I was about the lack of time I had left but again, he put my mind, and my nerves somewhat, at ease with the old wives tale (maybe it's true?) that most PhD's don't even get results till their 3rd year, anyway.

So, he doesn't seem to have lost all faith in what I'm doing. I'm sure I didn't impress him too much when he asked me about the Matlab program I'd written -- the topic of which I had admittedly, brought up -- and, as usual, I was taken off-guard and didn't understand, or know the answer to, his question. Ahhhh! Of course, I did know the answer, I just got all freaked out and thought because Super is asking me a question, I cannot possibly know the answer?! But, it's my program and of course he doesn't know the answer because he hasn't seen the program you wrote. Wally.

He did take a trip with me down to the lab, during which he told me I may have to completely move my experiment. Noooo! All the optic alignment took far too long, I cannot start from scratch. But he assured me that because someone above him was making us move the lab, he agreed to it on the proviso that he could use 2 forklift trucks to move my experiment so as not to disturb the delicate optics. Way to go Super!

He set me some tasks and we're going to spend some time together on Friday going through this Matlab program I wrote. 'Could take hours' he said. Eek! But I am happy about it -- even if it does show up my lack of knowledge.


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