19 February 2014

Because I'm gross, rubbish, anti-mainstream and a bad person

This might be a risky post but I'm going with it.

There are a lot of social expectations, conventions, rules and values in life, aren't there? I certainly think so. You're expected to do, say and think certain things. You're expected to be good at certain things and dislike others (things, not people). This can get even more complicated within your own social circle, work environment or for 'someone your age'.

With some of these things — things I should or shouldn't do, things that are or aren't expected of me — I go against the grain. Not always deliberately; some things I'd really like to do or be good at.

So, what are they?

GROSS.
It's not cool and it's not glamorous but I enjoy eating beans on toast, as well as hot dogs which I know are all the shit bits of the meat. I sometimes eat until I've made myself feel sick because it tastes so. good. I don't always brush my teeth or take my make-up off before I go to bed. And I know that I should. Totally aware. But I don't. Some weekends, I don't want to shower. I mean, I want to be showered, but I cannot be arsed to go through the process of actually getting in the shower, washing and drying my hair and doing something with my fizzog. I enjoy having needle injections and pressing bruises. It's weird and it's gross, but I do.

RUBBISH.
Society and your contemporaries expect you to be good at geography don't they? Well, I'm not. I don't know how or why, I must've decided at some point to just ignore this. But this is one thing I would like to be and am trying to be better at. Visiting places is what works for me; I can then place them on a map. And another thing, I can't judge temperature. You know, when the weather report tells you that it's going to be 19°C outside today, I don't know whether that means I need a coat or not. I know what cold and hot are, but with these mid-range temperatures, I'm lost! An ex found this hilarious. Oh and I'm a slow reader. Powering through a book in a day or two isn't a regular occurrence and I've learnt it's probably because I'm not a scan reader. Speed spelling is a slight issue too. If I ask someone how to spell a certain word, e.g. necessary, if at lightening speed they reel off 'n-e-c-e-s-s-a-r-y', I struggle.

ANTI-MAINSTREAM.
I'm a big fan of veg! But sometimes, I don't eat all of the veg on my plate. And I'm not going to eat them just because they're good for me. If they're raw and taste like shit, they're going to get shunned. Harry Potter is not for me. Everyone is supposed to love it but I don't and I have no desire to find out. Which leads me on to my next point; if everyone is doing something, I really don't want to do it. I remember trying on a pair of shoes and the saleswoman saying they were very popular and a lot of people had bought them. I couldn't get them off my feet fast enough!! I don't want to buy an iPhone, die my hair ombre style, hate Amazon for their tax avoidance or put quinoa in everything (not to mention the fact that the Western demand for the stuff has made it too expensive for Bolivians and Peruvians to buy meaning their main food source is now completely unobtainable! See here.).

A BAD PERSON.
Laughing at and assessing people. It happens. I do it. And I don't think it's in a mean way. Like, if someone trips, and it looks comical, I'm going to laugh. But if they hurt themselves, it's not funny. Sometimes I'm pretty selfish and short with people. I don't always automatically ask people how their weekend was, or even remember what they said they were going to be doing that weekend. Walking past a homeless person stresses me out, because I feel guilty about not giving them money. And then I notice I've made it all about me! I've already talked about being a bad friend by some people's standards. And I don't say Happy Birthday to people on Facebook. Nor do I feel guilty about that.

I'm sure others have similar quirks and traits, and I have plenty of others where I do conform that 'outweigh' these. But sometimes these expectations, rules and conventions stick in my throat a little.

Jen

14 comments:

  1. This is a really interesting post, and I totally see where you're coming from. For what it's worth, I watch when I get an injection, and I love giving blood...obviously because it's a good thing to do, but also because I like the feeling of it, especially the bit where the tube is taped to my forearm and it feels nice and warm. Is that weird? Well, I can't help it!

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    1. Thanks Amy! Oh I am happy I'm not the only nutter with my like of needles. Yup, giving blood is fun for me too. You shouldn't try to help it! :D

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  2. I spent years refusing to watch Friends because everyone liked it so I couldn't possibly imagine that I would like it too. When I finally started watching it years after it finished, it turned out to be EXTREMELY GOOD. So that was me told.

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    1. Yeah, I really should just suck it up and get with the programme sometimes. I just get so stubborn!

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  3. I like you Jen and I like this post. I am gross (I like squeezing black heads), rubbish (I can't always remember my kids names, or the cats), anti-mainstream (don't do Harry Potter but have inherited an unloved iphone) and I am most certainly a bad person on some days, maybe a little bit bad most days actually. Aren't we all?

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    1. Aww thanks Christina! I like yo too and I'm glad you enjoyed the post. I'm happy you're not the only that is a spot-squeezer. Mind, I think quite a few of us are!

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  4. Well this was flipping refreshing! Thanks for sharing honestly :) xxx

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  5. I love hotdogs. I eat them loads when Jim's away. Once to get over the fact he looked at me like i was a crazy lady for having them in the fridge when he returned, I blamed needing to give Flash some tablets. Also, beans on toast, with cheese = best meal ever! I'd never seen a HP film until I met him either, I still haven't seen them all, but we did do the tour which was fun, if only to laugh at all the HP nerds surrounding me. And I've always been anti-Iphone. Android all the way for me!
    Love this post. x

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    1. Thanks Em, glad you enjoyed the post! Ha. Love that you had to cover up the hotdogs. Sometimes I feel like I SO have to do that with some of the food that I buy and eat. Definitely agreed on the Android.

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  6. Beans on toast is a meal of the gods! Especially with cheese, as Em says. And yeah, I really like having blood taken (I like to watch it zoom out of my vein, that's pretty gross right?), and don't even get me started on squeezing blackheads and spots... if that's wrong, I don't want to be right.

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    1. Yes Jane, meal of the Gods. Agreed. I know are a few people who are grossed about by blood, even the thought of it. But not me, I enjoy watching my blood being taken too. Let's all be not right! :D

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  7. Hi Jen
    I've just found your blog through the lovely Louisa's post about her "five bloggers to watch this year" and can't wait to read more of it! I'm totally with you on the can't-be-arsed-to-shower-at-the-weekends thing, and the homeless people double levels of guilt, and the crapness at geography and understanding what temperatures mean in terms of clothing. I'm off to read more of your blog now, just to check we're not secretly twins separated at birth.

    Katie xxx

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    1. Hi Katie,

      Oh thank you so much for stopping by and for leaving such a nice comment! It's great to know so many people relate to this, rather than actually thinking I am gross, rubbish, anti-mainstream and a bad person. I cannot wait to get acquainted with your blog! :D

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