27 May 2014

Tinderella? Seems not.

After deciding last month to create a Tinder profile for myself, I said I would tell you lovely lot about my first foray into the world of internet/online dating. I certainly planned to do that much sooner than this, especially given that I ended that post with an impending eagerly anticipated first date with a fellow Tinderite on the horizon.

But you know how it is. And since then I might have, ya know, opted to make some other internet/online dating stuff happen. So I thought I could share my experimental meander through this landscape in a series of posts. Here is the first in that series. Disclaimer: I cannot tell you how long this 'series' is going to be. So you probably shouldn't get too attached. Just sayin'.

It seems the first thing I should do is decide whether I want to call it internet dating, or online dating. Tough call, right? Probably mostly wrong. I'll go with online dating.

OK, where were we? Ah yes, I'd just created a profile on Tinder despite my reservations, and gotten talking to a few would-be suitors. Most seemed nice enough, several whom you matched with but neither of you said a word to each other, and those who could probably do with a little helping hand in the conversational-skills department. An example? This >>

Yeeeeaaahhhh. Let's move on.

My first, and thus far only, Tinder date took place with Richard *not his actual name, a twenty-something involved in making British television documentaries. Before meeting, he'd brought some good conversation, wasn't a million miles removed from my wavelength, and seemed to have a sense of humour. As I've already mentioned — along with my guilt about it — I like a certain level of intelligence in a man. This isn't always based on whether they went to university — although that is a good measure — and I'm not elitist about it, it's just that commonality is good. Moral of the story: this guy met some pretty basic criteria.

Once he suggested a date, I let him choose the location. He opted for Charlie's Bar in Bristol. They have a very good selection of cocktails, and thus, a few rum cocktails featured in the evening along with others being tested by the barman, given to us for free since the place was almost deserted. He kindly purchased the first set of drinks and set up a tab, although I paid for the pairs I ordered at the bar. The conversation flowed pretty well, we had a few things in common and I was having a good time.

However, Richard couldn't seem to make his mind up about his own age; it appeared to increase from 27 to 29 in the space of an hour. I'd given someone younger than myself a chance, it seems, just because. And when he admitted that his friends described him as still living the student lifestyle a lot of the time, I realised younger probably wasn't going to work for me.

Finally, friendly Dick took the leap of inviting me back to his for a, wait for it, cup of tea; Earl Grey if I wanted it even! I declined; anyone who knows me is aware I'm not a hot-drink drinker. Oh and the small issue of visiting the house of a man I'd met just three hours prior. Not my thing.

Instead, I opted to wait for the bus and call my mother. Because I am that rock and roll. I mostly felt indifference; if he texts, cool; if he doesn't, cool. And it seems we both felt an affinity for the latter since there was not one iota of further communication between us.

A few more interactions with other Tindermen followed, but none were converted into dates.

Bottom line: Tinder proffered little in the way of a prince charming and I was no more Tinderella than this very lady. Disclaimer: this does not at all represent my Tindering style/approach.

Next time: OKCupid or StupidCupid?




Jen

6 comments:

  1. I have to say I was interested to see how this turned out. I am intrigued by other people's experiences of online dating as for the many horror stories, there are as many successes. Much like any kind of dating, I suppose. I look forward to further features in the series and I'll try not to get too attached to your dating life. Cos that would be kinda odd in itself.

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    1. Perhaps I shall have to experience many a horror story before I have any success, or maybe I'll just give up. Who knows! :D

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  2. Aaah Tinder, I know very little about Tinder and what I do know is summed up pretty well by the convo you had on there! So we're off Tinder? Where next? This is a whole new world to me!
    And thanks for not being the girl who goes back with Dick after knowing him 3 hours, I knew I liked you
    M x Life Outside London

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    1. Yup, that's Tinder alright. Confession: I'm not compleeeetely off it. It has this strange lure and a further few conversations have started after I updated the app, as I think how out of date it was meant I was getting any matches. Yeaaaah, that's the only reason...

      And thanks for er... like, liking me and stuff.

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  3. It's amazing that Neanderthals have such good keyboard skills...I thought that sort of conversation had died out years ago!

    Tinder is way too "Am I hot or not?" for me (and thank God I'm not in the dating pool any more), but I am curious about eHarmony!

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    1. You would think so, wouldn't you?! Not so much as it turns out, and some of the photos on there! I saw very rude pictures of both men and women on one profile that turned out to be a couple looking for a threesome.

      I've not had any experience with eHarmony either but does sound interesting.

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